Stress levels rising to critical levels in women

Stress levels in women have reached epidemic proportions. 75 to 90 percent of visits to primary care physicians are for stress-related complaints. Increases in heart disease, sleeping problems, stomach ailments, infertility and chronic fatigue syndrome (also diagnosed as fibromyalgia).

All of this because we are too stressed out, and we do nothing about it!

You remember, when we were kids, we couldn’t wait until we grew up and no one was bossing us around, and we could do whatever we wanted whenever we wanted, right? 
Many of us had a short period of time in our lives when that was actually true, it was called College. Then, our parents, or mentors, or someone in our lives told us that we had to “grow up” and that “life’s not just one big party” and we had to become responsible and fly right. 
So then we spend the next 40 or 50 YEARS waiting until we can retire so we can do whatever we want whenever we want. 

Well, the sobering truth is that a lot of folks don’t make it to enjoy their retirement and most people who do certainly can’t do whatever they want once they do retire because they are either sick and feeble or living on a shoestring or both.

So here’s the scoop, we need to find a way to enjoy our lives today. We have to stop waiting for that magical someday to come because it just might not. 
Now, I’m not telling you that if you have a job you hate that I can fix that (well, actually maybe I can, but that’s not what I'm talking about today), and I’m not telling you that I can fix any issues that may exist with your spouse or significant other. And I’m certainly not telling you that I can prevent your kids from making you crazy. What I am telling you, is that there are things you can do to manage your stress, so that these things aren’t ruling YOU and they aren’t the only thoughts that camp out in your brain 24 hours a day. And they’re so much easier than you might think.

Check this out...

The head of psychiatry at Stanford University gave a lecture on the relationship between stress and disease. He said, among other things, that one of the best things that a man could do for his health is to be married to a woman BUT for a woman, one of the best things she could do for her health was to nurture her relationships with her girlfriends.

At first everyone laughed, but he was serious.

Women connect with each other and provide support systems that help each other to deal with stress and difficult life experiences. Physically this quality girlfriend time helps us to create more serotonin--a neurotransmitter that helps combat depression and can create a general feeling of well being. Women share feelings where men share activities, and evidently that is very good for our health. He said that spending time with a friend is just as important to our general health as jogging or working out at a gym. - Did you catch that?

There's a tendency to think that when we are exercising we are doing something good for our bodies, but when we are hanging out with friends, we are wasting our time and should be more productively engaged--not true. In fact, he said that failure to create and maintain quality personal relationships with other women is as dangerous to our physical health as smoking! - WOW as dangerous as smoking!

OK - I want everyone to take note, the head of psychiatry at Stanford University has gone on record saying that having a glass of wine with your girlfriends is as important as exercise and NOT doing so is as dangerous as smoking! Well, maybe he didn’t say the wine was a requirement, but we need those antioxidants, right?

In between our “grown up play dates” there is something else we can do, to decrease our stress levels passively on a daily basis.



 

Women need a place in their home that is just for them. Whether it is a bedroom or bathroom sanctuary, or a quiet corner of a living room with a comfy chair and a book-stand. Women need to create for themselves that special place where they can unwind and recharge so we can face the next day, or the rest of today. 

It's not a luxury, it's critical to our well being and the well being of all those we care for. 

Some of the most popular personal sanctuaries are: a reading nook, a bathroom spa, a bedroom escape, a meditation space and a backyard oasis, but they can be as unique and varied as we are as women. What is your idea of a personal sanctuary?

What they all have in common is that they create a unique feeling, and grant the ability to breathe a relaxing sigh.


This taking care of ourselves stuff is really truly important. Not all new age and woo woo. We blow it off and then we wonder why our physical and mental health is on a constant state of decline. We tell ourselves that we just need to make it through Friday and then we'll get a chance to regroup. Then the weekend comes and goes with its own list of to-do's and chores and obligations. And before we know it, it’s Sunday night and we’re just as exhausted, overwhelmed, overworked and underappreciated as we were on Tuesday or Wednesday.

So what are you waiting for? Share in the comments: Are you going to schedule a "grown up play date" on your calendar this week, or what is your idea of a personal sanctuary (bathroom, bedroom, meditation space, backyard)?

Just Relax!

Is it just me, or when you are all spun up about something, or feeling excessively tense, or just completely overwhelmed and someone, a well meaning someone, tells you to "Just Relax" does it have the opposite effect?

But when you are overwhelmed, over worked and just ready to tip over the edge you need SOMETHING. And we're all tempted to do the most unhealthy things to get through. We grab a chocolate bar, or some "comfort food", maybe a big bowl of ice cream or a gooey brownie. All those things are great to indulge in once in a while, and if you've been reading me for any time, you know I'm a big promoter of doing something that truly makes you happy and even indulging every now and then. The point here is that this isn't really going to reduce your stress level, and what's worse, it will increase the dreaded guilt!

As busy business women, we are constantly juggling and trying to clear an ever filling plate. We end up in a vicious cycle that leaves us feeling guilty and isolated. We feel guilty that we don't get to the things on our plate that have been there the longest, but always seem to lose out on priority. We feel guilty that we're neglecting our family when we're working. We feel guilty that we're neglecting our work when we're with our family. We feel guilty that we haven't come up with a solution to this whole "life balance" equation yet. We feel guilty that there are people in our lives we cherish that we promise and promise to see, but that commitment just ends up being another item on our plate with a "C" priority that doesn't make the cut. And perish the thought of doing something just for you.

But that's just the thing that you need.

The head of psychiatry at Stanford University gave a lecture on the relationship between stress and disease. He said, among other things, that one of the best things a woman can do for her health is to nurture her relationships with her girlfriends. He said that spending time with a friend is just as important to our general health as jogging or working out at a gym.

Women connect with each other differently and provide support systems that help each other to deal with stress and difficult life experiences. Physically this quality girlfriend time helps us to create more serotonin--a neurotransmitter that helps combat depression and can create a general feeling of well being. Women share feelings where men share activities.

Brain Chemistry information from Beverly Keyes Taylor @ www.genderbrainchemistry.com

Stress is the cause of almost all health problems, which is the direct effect of the level of cortisol released into the body during stressful times.  

The stressed man wants to withdraw and just relax, mindlessly forgetting about the stress of his day. This is a necessary action for him to rebuild the testosterone used up during the stress of the day.

The stressed woman wants to talk about her stress, as that increases her oxytocin and serotonin. As she talks to an intent and well trained listener, her levels of serotonin and oxytocin rise, and she begins to feel more relaxed. As women have more language centers in both hemispheres of the brain, she more easily articulates, communicates, and expresses her emotions and feelings.

When the stressed man is not allowed to recover his testosterone, and the stressed woman doesn’t raise her oxytocin level, their cortisol level stays high. This changes the brain chemistry, leaving them feeling exhausted, overwhelmed and even more stressed.

Not to mention, cortisol is the hormone that stores the toxins in the body. It surrounds them with water and fat, and stores them right in the mid section. Cortisol also raises the level of hypertension, coronary disease, embolisms and obesity. This vicious cycle begins with not taking care of the level of stress according to your gender. This changes the chemistry of your brain. Therefore you may notice physiological changes brought on by stress such as mood swings, irritability and depression. Physical changes such as of loss of health may follow.

So when we get together, and we talk about what's going on in our lives, we get relief. We get relief from the guilt over not keeping our commitment to see these wonderful ladies. We get relief from the feeling of isolation that we are the ONLY person going through what we're currently experiencing. We get relief from being "on-duty". We get encouragement, advice, support and strength from our community. We laugh, we reminisce, we relax. 

And our stress starts to melt away.

So the next time you hear "Just Relax" it's time to phone, text or email your favorite girlies and schedule some quality girl time.

I'm curious, when is the last time you got together with your girlfriends? What did you do?

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Chemistry

Chemistry... 

When I hear the word "chemistry", the first thing that comes to mind is the class in high school.

The second thing that comes to mind is the "sparks" that do or do not exist between two people as they evaluate their level of attraction.

Today, I'm considering the word chemistry as it relates to our brains and our emotions. Our brain chemistry.

It's mid July and I expect many of you are feeling pretty good these days. Life moves just a little slower in the summer. Kids aren't in school, so you don't have quite so many activities to shuffle. It may even be vacation time. 

For me mid July sends me into happiness overload as I head to my national sales convention. Surrounded by thousands of other women (and a dozen or so men - HAHA) who are enthusiastic and on fire; eager to hear the latest innovations from the top achievers and see the newest products being added to the line.

Underneath all these good feelings is our brain chemistry. Most specifically Serotonin. Serotonin is the neurotransmitter that is responsible for feelings of well-being and enhanced mood. Increasing serotonin levels can also lead to significant reductions in anxiety and stress levels.

There are loads of things that impact our serotonin level. Chocolate is high on the list, as is sunlight, meditation and exercise. Some less known things that
increase serotonin are red wine, the tannins in red wine raise serotonin and spending time with other women. When women gather together, their serotonin
levels increase significantly.

Oxytocin is another feel good hormone often called the “cuddle hormone”. Oxytocin is released when we feel love, trust and comfort. It can be even more
powerful than serotonin. If you need a lift, remember the power of simply spending time with your significant other or family members and friends.

I'm fascinated by the science behind this stuff. It also makes me feel validated. It's good to know that I'm supposed to feel amazing when I hang out with other
amazing inspiring women, for real scientific reasons.

Isn't it good to know we're wired to feel great when we're together?

So the next time you're feeling like you need a little spark or happy, or your stress is getting too high, up that Serotonin level!