Staying Connected - A Wake Up Call

Like many people, one of our holiday traditions is sending out a Christmas card. Also like many people, invariably we end up sending it out pretty late. I think maybe some years we've even sent them after Christmas Day. 
That wasn't the case this year, however this past week, we received several via return mail. Perhaps 6.

I found that this made me fairly upset. With myself. I felt like "what a horrible friend am I that I didn't even know Tom and his wife moved". Certainly, I could choose to think instead, "well, it's not like they sent out a change of address card or anything", but I didn't. And I don't. 

A few months back, a friend wrote a spectacular post about why she was leaving Facebook and deleting her account. She spoke eloquently about how she wanted to keep in touch with people who actually cared about the things going on in her life, and not superficially stay connected via non specific status updates and posts. She posts regularly on Google+ and in the time since she left Facebook, indeed we have found so many fun facts we never learned about one another in 2+ years of being "connected" on Facebook.

Don't get me wrong, I have no intention of leaving Facebook, and I do find fun and enjoyable interactions there daily. I do keep in touch with some of my friends, especially long distance ones in a way that I couldn't easily otherwise. 

But I have been reminded, at the volume of 11 (I'm entertained by the Spinal Tap reference and hope some of you get it), that we need to be actually connected with our friends and loved ones. We need to stay engaged and learn about the things going on in their lives. Even if you may feel that nothing has changed in your life recently, if you feel that the answer to the "So what's new with you?" question is "same old same old", ask your friends. 

And most importantly ... listen to the answer.

My husband and I, over the holiday season, engaged in 2 separate very embarrassing conversations, and nearly a 3rd, where we asked a question that led to a horribly uncomfortable conversation that started with the other person saying "Oh, I guess you hadn't heard...".

My goal for 2013 and beyond is to avoid those awkward conversations by caring about the goings on in my friend's and families lives, by asking "Hey, how's it going?" regularly, and by making every effort to actually get together face to face or over the phone or video conference to connect real time.

What do you think? Would your happiness level increase through these conversations? Would that of your friends and loved ones? I believe so!

I'd love to hear your thoughts! Please share in the comment below.