Trials and Tribulations

Business ebbs and flows. As an employee, that doesn't matter so much to you, unless or until it results in job instability or loss. As an entrepreneur, it matters, as a solopreneur, it matters a lot. 

The business model I'm in is direct sales. It's an awesome business model! But the ebb and flow can be painful. Because we work one on one with our customers, the ebb can feel personal. 

We are trained, with the business comes cancellations and postponements. It's just part of the business, expect them. We are also trained that it is a numbers game, and we understand that cognitively. But, emotionally, well that's another story. 

I'll share what happens to me, it's a cycle I'm working hard to break, and sharing this with all of you is part of how I hope to break the cycle for myself and perhaps help someone else who falls into the same cycle. If no more than to let them know it's not just them.

I'll get into a state of flow. My numbers may not be multiplying, but I'll get in a grove where my actions are in flow and the results I see from those actions start to flow as well. I'll fill my calendar with appointments, feeling good about all the work I put in. 

Then, it happens. Those "to be expected" cancellations and postponements. 

Now that comfy cushy pad of appointments I had set on my calendar starts to grow sparse. Even though I've been told to expect it, even though I've experienced it before, the truth is, it hurts my feelings. I know it shouldn't. But it does. In a business where I work one on one with my customers, I feel like I've been duped, misled, let down. It's not true, it's not rational, but it's how I feel at these times.

Then it becomes a snowball. The hurt turns to frustration and sometimes even anger. Why bother to work so hard to fill my calendar with appointments, when it is all for naught in the end. I become quietly, secretly despondent. On the outside, I look the same. I do some of the same activities, mostly the busywork ones. I tell myself I'm still doing what needs to be done, but not exerting any grand effort. And then the situation simply persists. 

Then the flow will start again, slowly but it doesn't take much. The flow is the juice, it is energy, it fuels. When things are moving forward, it's easy to do the things to keep moving forward, to keep growing. 

Until the next ebb. And they can come at any time, they can come at a time of great flow. In the direct sales model, I've had it when I experience a huge surge in team growth. A great number of my super hosts decide to join my team! Woo Hoo! Just exactly what we want! Except, then all the appointments I have filled my calendar with from their circles transfer to them, leaving holes. 

So, the pat industry answer is to plan for these and over book your calendar and make sure to be expanding in multiple circles all the time. But the truth is that simply isn't always what happens. You can't or simply don't always plan for these things. 

So, where is the self-care lesson in all of this? What do you do when the ebb comes? 

I'm talking about my business, but this can be applied to loads of areas in your life that go swimmingly well for a time then fall off leaving you feeling at a loss. 

Here's my plan: 

1. Acknowledge the hurt. You're allowed to be hurt, even it it's irrational. NOT to your customers, obviously. But to yourself. You can journal about it, meditate, call your best friend to talk it out, sit and have a good cry if you need to. *** NOTE *** this is not permission to wallow. This is a short term expression of the feelings you have.
2. Remind yourself that it is not the end of the world, because it's not. You know these things happened, have happened before and will happen again. And you've seen the other side of them always. The other side is coming.  
3. Make a list of 3 great things happening at this instant in this area.
4. Come up with 1 crazy idea to try to change it right now.
5. Step away for a minute to regroup and collect yourself. This is a great time to do something wonderful for yourself as a special treat. A massage, a great cup of tea or glass of wine, a walk, an intense workout. *** NOTE *** this is not permission to give up for a prolonged period of time. Like step 1, this is a quick break to allow you to come back energized.
6. Do at least 1 ACTIVE thing every day for a week to grow and support this area. You can't count the passive or neutral tasks you do as part of your normal activities.
7. Applaud yourself each day for doing this thing, and take notice of what starts to show up.

You will find that the flow starts again. It may seem like it's magical, it may come from areas not directly related to the actions you take. But things will start to flow, just like they are supposed to. 

I'd love to hear if this is something that you struggle with too. Please share your thoughts in the comments. And, if this plan helps you, I'd really love to hear about that as well!